EIGHT FLOORS (5F)
Eight apartments. Eight lives mid-thought. One rogue firework tearing through them all.
EX-REGRET MANIFESTATION - Make Them Miss You, Deep Remorse Energy, Emotional Reflection Ritual USD 3.54
She is torn between making him pay and winning him back. Both hankerings are driven by the dull chagrin sitting in her chest since he dumped her last week. They had only been seeing each other for a month.
She would have been perfectly happy to never see him again but he latched on to her, behaved so attentively, gave her pet names. He started using the kissy emoji after the first time they had sex on their second date. It makes her dizzy to remember. As soon as she started reciprocating, he began to withdraw. She wonders if that is his M.O. since, four weeks to the day feels suspiciously calculated.
The AI generated image on the Etsy spell depicts a man with his arms crossed, head looking down with sorrow and regret, surrounded by a swirl of golden light. Is it like buying physical goods: you get what you pay for. Is that how spells work too?
What Is Their Karma for Hurting You - Same Hour Tarot Reading, Accurate Psychic Insight, Fast Spiritual Message, Karmic Justice Reading USD 5.22
Maybe it is enough to know that he will suffer somehow. Maybe she only needs Karmic justice to feel peace again. She lights her sage and opens all the windows. The wind is howling and the rain falls soft, baptizing the city. She catches a glimpse of the space needle and remembers their first kiss at Kerry Park. She’s mad again. Why lay it on so thick?! She changes the filter to sort by price: highest to lowest.
Strong Obsession Love Spell – Make Him Crave You Deeply, Magnetic Bonding, Desire Awakening Ritual + 2 Free Spiritual Readings USD 191.40
At 4.9 out of 5 stars from 576 reviews this feels like it could be a worthy investment. Maybe she could make him fall in love with her and then she could do to him what he did to her? Her speaker’s battery dies, silencing Fiona Apple’s brooding incantations.
Never Cheat On Me Spell - Powerful Loyalty Spell, Fidelity Magic USD 290.00
Maybe she could cast the obsession spell then hit him with the never cheat on me spell. She couldn’t say for certain he was a cheater, could she? Perhaps a serial monogamist. Even with a one-month window of monogamy, he could win on technicality. That should count as cheating, she thinks. $500 worth of spells is excessive so she changes her strategy.
Belial Crushes Him – Ritual to Spiritually Dismantle a Male Rival’s Confidence, Voice & Status- Black Magic Ritual Spell USD 63.00
Something about the idea of “dismantling” him appeals to her. She pours the last bit of Cabernet Sauvignon into her glass. She imagines him naked—first she would peel off his tattoo (a wolf’s head that covers his entire chest.) Then she’d work from head to toe, finally popping off his limbs like a Ken doll. She wonders if she might have just accidentally cast the spell herself with the intensity of that visualization.
Custom Made Spell: Tailored to Your Needs USD 46.40
With only one 5 star review about the seller being “communicative and prompt”—she passes. Besides, she is clearly incapable of knowing exactly what her needs are.
Thoughts changer spell - Change decisions, Implant thoughts, Spellcasting, Fast cast spellwork USD 24.99
Ah-ha! She could first plant the thought that he misses her and then repeat the spell as she figures out what to do with him. Like a ventriloquist, hand deep inside his mind. She hasn’t even decided if she likes him that much, but not having the choice to have him anymore isn’t working for her. She wants a say in the ending too.
Before she can finish her next thought, the floor rips open and the room fills with smoke.